Cold War

I’m always saying sorry

A quick fix

To a long problem

I’m sorry for the things I said

I’m sorry for the anger I expressed

But while this time I am still sorry

I do not regret

Interpreting a Cold War

As a threat

In escalating this situation

And meeting it head on

You locked me into this battle

Do not act like I am it’s only combatant

Little Things

The little things

They add up right?

But what about the tiny things

The microscopic?

If you can’t even see

My bones in a microscope

Not a single fleck of white

Does that mean all those little things

That took up so much time

That made me

And unmade me

Does that mean they didn’t add up?

Baseline

Is unfortunate

But I found out

The baseline

Almost feels worse

No extremes on either end

But does that mean

There is no reason for anything?

I can’t get up;

But I can, but I can

I can’t get up;

But what will I do if I can

I can’t?

Just One Night

Maybe it’s because I wasn’t the first

Maybe it’s because I wasn’t committed enough

Maybe it’s because in the grand scheme of things it didn’t seem so serious

Just one night

Doesn’t seem so bad

Just one night

Doesn’t change someone’s life

If there was a permanent reminded

Some open wounds, some scars, some physical after effects

It wouldn’t be treated as normal

But no

We went home

And life went on as always

The only difference being

That I slept

And I slept

And I slept

Force of Keeping Quiet

I feel them not in my throat

Nor the back of my mouth

But on the roof of it

I trap them there with my tongue

Pressing up hard so I don’t gag

With the force of wanting to keep quiet

It’s not that I can’t just say them

It’s that I want to pretend not to exist

For a little bit longer

Always in the Wrong

I can tell from the look in your eyes

I’m completely to blame

I’m the tree that fell over

Onto your good mood

I’m the quake that toppled

Everything you’ve ever done

But I’m a tree that fell

Because of all the tiny little things

Eating away at me

I’m the earth that quaked

Because the constant grating

Caused me to slip

But those are things not seen

And so of course

I’m always the one

Who breaks

Who rages

Who’s always in the wrong

And so of course

I’m always the one

Who, in the end

Is so easily condemned